Rough going

I'm having a rough patch, but I refuse to binge.

It seems like I've been ditched for the night. I know my friend is a flake, but call or text me or something.

I am having a chocolate craving. I really want some crappy sweets - snickers, twix, kit kats, reseses. They are all calling to me. It's a good thing I don't have any in the house. The only thing chocolate near by is cocoa powder and that requires too much work to try to make something of.

At the same time, I feel like I ate to much today even though I stayed at 1310.  I feel like I just binged even though I didn't. I am having feelings of panic that the scale will be up tomorrow.  I want to cry just thinking about it. But this craving for binge foods won't go away either... it's freaking me out. I feel like I am getting fatter by the second just sitting here typing this.

The stupid thing is that the Bikram yoga class left me feeling really good. I enjoyed and I felt energized by it.  But now a few hours later, I am freaking out. I don't know how many calories I burned during yoga because my HRM wouldn't work. I didn't want to wear the watch and get it all sweaty but it was too far away from the chest strap on the ground so it turned off. I think it may have been about 400 calories or more. But I hate not knowing, they might as well not count if I don't know the real number.

I think I just need to go to bed and be better tomorrow...