Hold On for One More Day [Day 29]

36 hours from now I will be on a plane going to see my BF!! I almost can't stand it.  As much as I want to work out today (it's too ridiculously hot to though, no A/C at home) I think I am going to go straight to bed just to get the day over with faster!! (and because I'm dead tired)

Yesterday was disappointment. I went out to the movies with a girlfriend and even though I had planned to be good all day I ended up eating a lot of bread and hummus. Then, the movies with Twizzlers and popcorn. I know I shouldn't have, but a part of me just said, you're out, have fun it's okay etc. Stupid voice! Sabotaging me!

I had a mini panic when I got home around midnight (construction on the freeway at 11pm wtf?) and couldn't sleep. The BF had called me while I was at the movie and mentioned that I'll want to bring going out clothes because we'll be hitting at least one uptown club while I visit. And all I could think of was I'm too fat to fit into my nice club wear. So around 1am I grabbed up my skinny jeans, some short shorts that I used to wear dancing, and pair of banana republic capris that are tight size 2. I had to know the damage so that I could fast or do whatever I needed to for the next 48 hours.

And to my surprise everything fit! And it all fit well. The only thing questionable was the short shorts that used to fit a little bit loser, but my mom says that my butt is lifting from all the exercise, so maybe that's it. The capris, the jeans, another pair of shorts all looked good and fit. No muffin top.

This morning I got up at 5:30 like normal (man, it was hard!) and I looked good. My abs weren't bloated and looked a little defined even. But the scale reflect last night's over indulgence It was weird, the scale tells a different story but things look and feel good. I guess I can take heart in that. It's not like anyone else sees my scale.

I'm really motivated to stay good today and tomorrow though, knowing that we'll be hanging out with the BF's new friends and going out to nice places. I want to look especially good. I want all of them to think about how tiny I am. Silly, I know, but I can't help it.

The fact that I'm tired is a little bit of a disadvantage. At work, because my impulse is to hit the sugar and find the nearest candy bowl. But I brought a Pepsi Max and I'll go get a Monster Zero if I have too. Plus I brought a bunch of fruit and veggies to work with me. Even though it goes against my eating only at a table and meal times. Today I am making an exception so I don't blow it.

 In the words of Wilson Phillips:

You've got no one to blame for your unhappiness
You got yourself into your own mess
Lettin' your worries pass you by
Don't you think it's worth your time
To change your mind?

So, Bridesmaids was hysterical! The soundtrack was great too. I mean, Wilson Phillips plays at the end. Transported me right back to the 90s. It doesn't get much better than that : ) Loved it.