When will I learn?

Yesterday was total bust. I probably had somewhere been 2500-3000 calories. Almost all of it junk. Two cinnamon rolls at 340 calories each, and a bunch of Reese's Pieces. I stopped counting after I hit 400 calorie mark.

I knew I needed to stop. I knew I was heading into binge eating territory. I knew I needed to spank my addictive voice in the rear end and give it a time out. But I let it seduce me instead. The junk is now out of the house. I made myself literally sick to my stomach - I though I was gonna pop out an alien baby that's how horrible I felt - and I am done with it. I know so many healthy alternatives for satisfying my cravings. So as of today I am giving up processed sugar. Yep. Sugar. No more buying candy. No more buying baked goods. I can make stevia versions of alot of things at home. I also learned about cocoa and child/slave labor, so if I absolutely need a treat I will make sure it's fair trade/organic chocolate.

The funniest thing is I DIDN'T gain. I don't know if it was the laxative I took the day before and I am dehydrated, or if my body was literally crying out for calories (not I am sure that it wanted empty sugar calories) because I had an intake around 1100 and a net of about 150 on Sunday.  My lesson here is not to drop too low because it will trigger all the binging urges. Which again, I know, but didn't follow because I was so panicked after Saturday. So I will make sure my net never drops below 500. I can't over compensate for a bad day, I just have to make better choices all together, and if I slip up just go back to the plan.

I started Ripped in 30 Level 4 yesterday. Because of my crap eating, I felt like crap. It was nearly Level Puke.  There is a reason Jillian Michaels has never done a level 4 before. I've only done it twice now - I've had to do the modifications, and right now I feel like my arms are going to fall off! This level I think is going to take me longer to get through because I'm going to need more rest days! The nice thing is that it's not leg heavy so if I'm doing it right up until having to get into my halloween costume it shouldn't make them look to big. I'm always concerned about the "pump" that muscles get after weight training. I don't want that before getting into either of my costumes.