Today was not a good day. I was up ridiculously late working after being at work all day. I did so well and I didn't gain anything yesterday, even though I ditched my snacks for dinner idea and ate the food offered at work. I had a huge salad with tiny amount of dressing and 7 ravioli. Then just 1 mini cupcake for dessert. I figured since I'd had an "indulgence" yesterday that I would be good today... no such luck.
All my snacks from yesterday were gone by noon and I wasn't even hungry. Then a mini bagel, candy from the candy bowl, and donuts. I feel like such a failure. The only good thing I can say that I did is that I left the drive through. Yep, I pulled in I was about to get in line and I thought - do you really want to do this? and I drove around the line and out of the parking lot.
I know that it's stress. I have so much work. Today I had to take my cats to the vet. It was just a regular screening, but there always seem to be something wrong with one of them and it makes me so nervous. I'm just waiting to find out that one or the other is going to die. I love my vet, he's the nicest guy and so knowledgable. He's always saying, "well, i read about X in an article and it's a long shot but let's test for it." And lo and behold, that's what's wrong with the cat. The man is really great at what he does. This time he saw really bad gigivitis, too bad for a cat this age and they were fine last time he was in. And the vet says, "there's this parasite... bla bla bla... blood test... bla bla bla" anyway.. I have to wait two weeks for the blood test to come back and then the cat gets antibiotics for a month if it's positive. No big deal not life threatening. So I don't know why I should be afraid. It's just that they're my fur babies.
Even so, I know I should know better than to give in to that. I need to learn to stop before I binge and start writing or doing something else constructive before deciding if I really want the food I am craving. I know what I am supposed to do, so why can't I do it? I have goals that I want to reach and I'm not going to get there at this rate.
So I was 9 days binge free. My record is 16 - from when I started really paying attention in March or April. If I can make it past October 8th, I will break my record... here's hoping I can break it and then some.
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| My fuzzy little creatures that make me crazy. |
3 comments:
You can make it past October 8th!!! If you find yourself about to B&P, blog - if you find yourself about to only purge, blog. I promise once I read it I will throw some words of encouragement your way! :o) Best of luck; you can do it.
And your kitties are CUTE!
Your kitties are very cute idd ^^
You did really good last time- so I am going to keep them well crossed for you hon. It seems to be a tad easier to deal with it for me now that I am planning every mouthful and keeping to that.
The only thing I don't bug my self about are liquids like tea and coffe (limiting the coffe to one cup if I have a milk based blend)
GL :)
In the past you've had some bumps and mistakes along the way before you get into your groove. Sometimes it just takes a bit to get back into the right mind set. Just keep trying.
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